I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
