dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
