chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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