She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize
