hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
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