Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
