Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I wish i was in the wii world.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
