Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
