I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Randomize
