I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I will pee on everything he values.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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