Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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