Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.