So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat