we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Is it penis luge time yet?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
