I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
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