So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
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