my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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