The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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