So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
