last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
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i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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