yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
