ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I need moral support for this bender
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
