I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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