last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
