After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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