i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
