In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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