dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
