Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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