My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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