Whod you bang
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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