I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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