If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
