Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
