I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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