hell yes lets make some ravioli
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
