Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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