just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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