i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Operation Purity has been aborted
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
