Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
