Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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