So drunk its hurt
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
