Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
