You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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