Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
This is classic penis vs brain.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
