You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
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