the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
