He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I wear drunk well.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
