so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
