everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
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