He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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